Why Donāt Men Cover Their Faces?
We used to play at my auntās garden when we were youngerā¦girls and boys, there was no differenceā¦ we grew up togetherā¦ we used to race, play, laughā¦ sometimes we would fight playfullyā¦ we used to watch TV togetherā¦ cry at the end of sad cartoons togetherā¦ we grew a bit older… we began to study for our classes togetherā¦ whenever weād fight we used to threaten the other that weād tell on them to the teacherā¦ we used to play practical jokes on one anotherā¦ weād laugh with all our heartsā¦
And so the days went byā¦
My cousin and I are staring outside the windowā¦ we are looking at the garden where my male cousin and his friends are playingā¦ this is the garden where we used to play togetherā¦ they used to be our friends once upon a timeā¦ these are the boys we used to play withā¦ what happened? Why are we prisoners at home, while they play ball outside with all freedomā¦ what did we do? Did we grow older? Did our bodies change? Did we become an object of temptation that needs to be covered from peopleās eyes? Arenāt those the boys we knew since we were children? What changed? Why are we strangers? Why do I run and hide whenever I hear one of their voices? Is it just because the pitch of his voice changed? Is that why we arenāt friends anymore? Are we supposed to act differently towards one another? Different to how we acted just yesterday? We started to act shy and anxious whenever weād speakā¦ we stopped playing with one anotherā¦ My cousin and I began spending our spare time watching Mexican soap operas, as if we were in our 50sā¦
And so the days went byā¦
I am at schoolā¦we are learning about what a woman should coverā¦ her hair is temptationā¦ her eyebrows are temptationā¦ I remembered my favorite male singerā¦ his eyes were beautiful tooā¦ his hair is beautifulā¦ why doesnāt he veil? I asked myself this question, however, I couldnāt find the answerā¦ I remembered that I was banned from playing in the garden because I hit pubertyā¦ however, my male friends werenātā¦ didnāt they hit puberty too? Why werenāt they imprisoned at home? I also couldnāt find the answerā¦
And so the days went byā¦
I hear it all the timeā¦ āA woman is a jewel that needs to be protected (i.e. covered)āā¦ and sometimes it is even said that a woman is like candy āif you remove the wrapper (i.e. the cover) the flies will swarm around herāā¦ I turn on the TV and find that favorite male singer that I am so fond of brushing his soft silky hair and flaunting his handsomenessā¦ his arms are bareā¦ his chest is bareā¦ why isnāt this object of temptation covered? Why isnāt he imprisoned at home? Why arenāt women tempted by him? Some might claim that a woman shouldnāt look at thisā¦ then shouldnāt men shield their gaze when looking at a tempting female āobjectā? I couldnāt find the answerā¦
And so the days went byā¦
I am at universityā¦ I see some people distributing a small religious bookā¦ āTemptations of a Womanāā¦Her hairā¦ her feetā¦ her eyes, and āthus, a woman must cover one of her eyes as both of them together are temptingāā¦I swear this is what I read in this book!… itās as if there is nothing left in this world to talk about and scrutinize other than a woman and how she is a temptationā¦I decided to observe menās looksā¦I wanted to know which women would attract men with her temptationā¦ in front of me walks a woman wearing a tight Abaya (long black cover)ā¦ aha!.. I found herā¦ she is an object of temptationā¦ I continue watchingā¦ in front of me walks a woman with a baggy Abaya, however, with an uncovered faceā¦the man stares at herā¦ aha! So her face is also a temptationā¦ a third woman walks in front of me… her face is covered and she is wearing a baggy Abaya from top to toeā¦ the man is staring at her! Huh? I donāt understandā¦ what is so tempting about a black Abaya? No eyes, no feetā¦ What is this man staring at? At that moment I realized that clothing has nothing to do with itā¦ men would stare on all occasionsā¦ however, he, with his broad shoulders and his hair, eyes and lips isnāt considered an object of temptation, even if all the women in the world started at himā¦Ā he is a manā¦he shouldnāt hide in his homeā¦ no one calls him a jewel… at that moment I wished I wasnāt a jewel. I wished to be a free manā¦
And so the days went byā¦
I am in a Western country… women are walking around meā¦one is wearing pants… the other is wearing a short skirtā¦another wears shortsā¦men and women are walking side by sideā¦ it is strange… no one is staringā¦ why donāt I see the looks of men I saw in my country? Those looks that made a woman feel nakedā¦ those looks that I hatedā¦ the ones that made me hate being on this earth, and hate being born a womanā¦ those looks that deny me my humanityā¦why donāt I see those looks here? All the women are dressed upā¦ why donāt I see those looks even though all the women are attractive here? I saw one women run and laughā¦ I remembered that I wasnāt allowed to run once I hit pubertyā¦ I remembered my auntās windowā¦ I remembered I was an object of temptation that must be coveredā¦ I remembered that a man in my country wears white, while I am covered in blackā¦ I asked myself, why donāt men wear black? Why donāt men cover their faces? And I couldnāt find the answerā¦
And so the daysĀ goĀ byā¦
Ā
Pakistanis for Peace 